Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Tame Elephant Bathing



Date: 25-March-2007

Playful elephant @ NagarhoLe National Park



Date: 24-March-2007

The Experience

Been in a situation wherein your every thought and every action pertains only to the 'now'... where you hear sounds you can identify, but the implications are unknown... where all the knowledge accumulated / driven into your brain tell you to act in a certain way... but your instinct or mind or 'free will' or 'stubborn self' directs you not to rely on that second-hand 'acquired' knowledge... you are forced to take a fresh look, thinking things through, starting over from a clean slate... where your 'knowledge' tells you, you ought to run... your rational brain tells you, you ought to feel fear... your observant self casually notes, there's no adrenaline-rush in my body... your curiosity tempts you to maintain status quo and see what's in store... your senses are so alert, it seems you've suddenly discovered you possess powers far greater than you ever imagined in your whole life this far... where you are free to make any decision you want... you are on your own... where you become aware of your existence?

I have!

It happened somewhere in the middle of NagarhoLe forest on Saturday 24-Mar-2007. It was the most unique and pleasurable sensation I've felt.

Maybe I was in danger. Maybe not. Maybe it was just a play of my wild imagination. Maybe I'm just plain lucky. Or far stupider than I give myself credit for.

But... the experience was worth every moment.

Friday, March 23, 2007

Charged ! %^@$*#`~

I am a Charged individual.

I never knew there were so many connotations of the word 'charged' until I looked it up just before writing this post. For example,

charge (chärj)

v. charged, charg·ing, charg·es

v.tr.

1.

a. To load to capacity; fill: charge a furnace with coal.

b. To saturate; impregnate: The atmosphere was charged with tension.

2. To load (a gun or other firearm) with a quantity of explosive: charged the musket with powder.

3. To instruct or urge authoritatively; command: charged her not to reveal the source of information.

4. To make a claim of wrongdoing against; accuse or blame: The police charged him with car theft. Critics charged the writer with a lack of originality.

5. To put the blame for; attribute or impute: charged the accident to the driver's inexperience.

6. Electricity

a. To cause formation of a net electric charge on or in (a conductor, for example).

b. To energize (a storage battery) by passing current through it in the direction opposite to discharge.

7. To excite; rouse: a speaker who knows how to charge up a crowd.

v.intr.

1. To rush forward in or as if in a violent attack: dogs trained to charge at intruders; children charging through the house.


Synonyms: charge, imbue, impregnate, permeate, pervade, saturate, suffuse
These verbs mean to cause to be filled with a particular mood or tone: an atmosphere charged with excitement; poetry imbued with lyricism; a spirit impregnated with lofty ideals; optimism that permeates a group; letters pervaded with gloom; a play saturated with imagination; a heart suffused with love..

Adj.

1.

charged - of a particle or body or system; having a net amount of positive or negative electric charge; "charged particles"; "a charged battery"

2.

charged - fraught with great emotion; "an atmosphere charged with excitement"; "an emotionally charged speech"

4.

charged - capable of producing violent emotion or arousing controversy; "the highly charged issue of abortion"

You will find the complete list of connotations of 'charged' at http://www.thefreedictionary.com/dict.asp?Word=charged.

‘Complete list’? Is there more? Of course! J Anyways… the meaning I’d like to dwell on just now is Definition 6a. (Yeah… I can’t escape the influence of my professional life!) (Oh, btw… using parenthesis is a bad idea, I read somewhere, since it denotes that the writer is unable to bring about a logical connection / flow between ideas. Seriously… does anybody care?!)

So… now that you know what I’m talking about… I can see that big grin beginning to light your face (didn’t I just mention electricity? :D) But… hold your horses! I speaketh the truth; the whole and naked truth; and nothing but the truth: so goD save you… that is, if HE Exists!

(Ellipsis, Parenthesis, Smilies, Bangs, Old English words, wrong CaPiTaLiZatiOn, bare (un)truths, wild and atheist claims… all in the same para. Wow! Broken ever so many rules of Grammar... and some more! Ain’t that simply LOVE-LY?)

Cutting a long story short… Coming straight down to the point… To hammer the nail bang! on its head… I’m electrically charged.

Now, don’t you scoff at me! I have witnesses – people who at first scoffed just like you, but are now Believers. ‘Who are these people?!’ you say? They are the ones who’ve seen and felt "The Spark". I’m not kidding! Many a time have I seen a spark jump right across the tiny space between my skin and some surface or the other person’s skin. And, it always occurs at the most unexpected of times.

My team-mate (& friend, & colleague, & companion, & fellow-sufferer – I can’t find ONE word that wholly and aptly describes these individuals) and I are working together at one desk. I suddenly put out my hand to grab the mouse before he gets to it and lo! There’s a spark jumping from one end of a strand of hair standing at attention on some part of my hand and one placid strand of hair on his. I pretend I saw nothing, felt nothing and try to carry on. But he recoils instantly and ‘Ouch! Did you feel that?’

‘What?’ I fix him with the most innocent look that I can manage. (Actually I believe I’m a good actor. Or is it actress? whatever!)

‘I got a shock! From you!’ He can’t believe it: he won’t believe it; he doesn’t want to believe it; but he HAS to believe it.

As I watch the struggle unfolding on his face I’m tempted to say, ‘See… NOW do you believe me?’ Instead, I say ‘Oh! Okay...’ averting my eyes, trying to convey an impression that the conversation’s ended. ‘Anyways… as I was saying… shouldn’t we be doing it like…’ I continue.

But he’s not listening to me. I know that. He’s staring at me stupidly, unable to believe that, for once (maybe, just this once), I wasn’t speaking ‘off the cuff’ when I first told him about this. He’s grudgingly turning into a Believer.

If I show the slightest interest to discuss the topic with him now, I’d have broken the Magic of the Moment. I let his innumerable questions hang in the air (a “charged” atmosphere… if you will). He’ll hit me with them some day, when he feels he has the right audience. I better watch out and be prepared so as not to appear a moron in front of those morons. But, at least, for now… I have one more Believer!

Thursday, March 15, 2007

A simple hobby

I've found myself a new hobby.

It's really simple and hardly costs you anything. But instant gratification and satisfaction's guaranteed!



Pre-requisites:

1) A sim-card with a great (read CHEAP) SMS-offer

2) a pesky, neurotic, slightly-psychopathic brother

No doubt, except for the few unfortunate, all of us are blessed with these.



Method:

1) Wait until your brother uses up all his free messages for the day.
Note - You could help speed up this step by egging him on.

2) Then, you gloat thusly -- "Haha! See... I told you I have a better offer on my sim! :D"

3) Next, you offer your sim-card in an act of great sibling-affection - but only for a short while.
Attention- The duration of sim-loan must be large enough to allow him time to get into mischief, but short enough to not let him complete.

4) Now, go and DEMAND All That Rightfully Belongs to YOU.
Note- The objective can be achieved with just your sim-card in this case. This will also ensure that you don't spend too much time on this activity.

5) Return to your sanctuary; replace the sim in your phone

6) Wait for a few minutes to receive the Residual Messages (from your brother's conversations).
Note- Obviously you don't recognize the sender's number, nor they yours.... 'coz if they're his friends, they'd know he's signed off and not bother messaging his older sibling. So, rest assured that he's reliably delivered his goods.

6) You reply thusly -- "Who're you?"
Note- In 9 out of 10 cases, you'll get a reply saying "Who's this?"

7) Aha! Now you're FREE to express yourself in whatever way you want.
You don't know the person at the other end, nor does s/he know you.
So have a BALL!
Remember- At no cost, and at no point, will you reveal your true identity.

Note- For an enhanced dose of self-satisfaction and pride, you could be as witty or as nasty or as good-ly as you have always never wanted to be in your real life.

8) When you've had enough, sign off with a polite 'good day!' or 'gn'.
Note- Ignore all pleas; reply no more.

9) Sit back and enjoy.
You've done a great deed today - you've got someone THINKING.



Simple, ain't it?



P.S. Drop me a line about your results.